Soulmates

                          

Part I - Strength and Attraction

​

​

Talking about soulmates is always interesting.

When the creator took Chava out from Adam, He turned a STRONG individual into two “weak” individuals.

While Adam lost a great portion of his "emotional" strength to his soulmate Chava and became weak, Chava lost a great portion of her "securities" and also became weak.

Now, they both had to work toward becoming STRONG again because their continuity and growth depended on their strength.

In fact, Adam and Chava failed their strength test when they ate from the forbidden tree.

Until today, we go through this test daily.

Torah refers to Chava as a "help" for Adam.

​

As a soulmate, Chava had the ability to see herself missing in Adam and help him get her back because SHE was his strength. 

​

The creator told Adam here is your strength Chava, get up and grow, rebuild your "emotional" strength by mirroring her "emotional" strength because SHE is your lack and potential.

 

Yes, women stand between the creator and men to "help" men become "emotionally" STRONG.

From "weak" to STRONG, the creator puts this growth as a sign in men's manhood to show men must first become "emotionally" STRONG or hard to be able to attract and connect with women and reach their potential.

In other words, reaching their "physical and spiritual potentials" depend on the "emotional" strength of men.

So let's look at some of the key advantages women have over men that will give them such positions and power.
 

• Women are far more patient than men and love the process while men are less patient and not a fan of the process. This is where men fail most of the time showing themselves as being needy and of course not attractive. The creator is very patient and He wants men to learn from women to be more patient too. 

​

• Women are far more detailed oriented than men. They pay more attention and are more observant of their surroundings than men. This is another area where men fail in life because of not paying enough attention. The creator wants men to learn from women to pay more attention.

​

• Women are far more alert to body language than men. They often communicate nonverbal while men are used to verbal communication and confirmation. Body or sign language is a universal language men must learn for better communication with women. The creator communicates with us through sign language and He wants men to learn this language from women and show themselves more in action than words.

​

• Women are far more attracted to behaviors than the physical appearance of men while most men give up all their powers when they see an attractive woman. Life is about growth and behavior communicates growth. The creator wants men to learn from women to give priority to behavior. The physical appearance shall be a plus. 

As a default setting, the creator took a great portion of these powers away from Adam and gave them to Chava. 

 

As a result, women are able to detect any "emotional" weakness and force men to work on their strength since women are biologically attracted to the "emotional" strength of men.

 

Yes, similarity attracts!

 

While people say women aren't attracted to nice guys, it's not really about being nice but being "emotionally" STRONG.

The same is true about jerks; it's the "emotional" strength women are attracted to, not the bad behaviors.

You probably have heard the expression saying “behind every successful man, there is a woman.”

Although this slogan may be true, why are all women after successful men?

Most women fall for fame, title, or financially strong men who aren't emotionally strong hoping their man will become emotionally strong in the future or after marriage.

But, no matter where a man stands, his soulmate is there to help him reach his potential.

Being STRONG is the only key to reaching his potential.

That is why a woman will always test her man to check his level of strength.

The stronger her man becomes, the more secure she'll feel about herself.

 

And the more secure she feels about herself, the stronger she becomes.

In other words, his strength IS her strength.​

Note that testing is a part of women's nature to figure out where they stand with men and it's done unconsciously.

Therefore, instead of saying “behind every successful man, there is a woman”, you may say “behind every STRONG man, there is a woman."

As a matter of fact, in Noah's time when men took women by force and raped them, the creator destroyed the world.

By acting emotionally "weak" and not facing women who could be their soulmates, men destroyed their own strength and potential.

And where there is no potential, there is no purpose for life or continuity.​

The creator destroyed the cities of Sedom and Gemorrah for the same reason. He allowed Shimon and Levi to destroy the city of Shechem because of rape.

Therefore, it's important for men to be aware NOT to force any woman for their own bodily gratification.

The message is VERY clear...

BE STRONG, IN CONTROL OF YOURSELF, AND FACE YOUR SOULMATE.

(There is a commentary saying when Adam was created, he and his soulmate Chava were attached together, back to back and facing opposite of each other. When the creator separated them from each other, He told Adam, "here is your feeling, face her!")

​
 

Part II - Continuity and Growth
 

​

So who's your soulmate?

The one that helps you reach your potential.

This doesn't mean you only have one soulmate.

You may have more than one soulmate just like our fathers Avraham and Jacob who had more than one soulmate.

Hevel was even born with two females as his soulmates.

Looking back into history we can observe how important the role of women has been to the creator.

In fact, every time it came to continuity and growth, we notice it was women who took the lead and even named their children. 

Women were more concerned than men and could see what men couldn't see.

As the soulmate of Avraham, Sarah wasn't able to give birth, and therefore she gave her maid Hagar to Avraham to bring a child. This way, she could benefit from the child through her husband. Later when Sarah had a conflict with Avraham over his son Ishmael, the creator told Avraham to listen to Sarah. 

 

When Avraham was in a sensitive situation, Sarah knew what needed to be done for continuity and growth based on the purpose of the creator.

 

If you ever wondered who Sarah really was, the hidden secrets I'm going to share with you about her will show the best example of a soulmate and that she was the lack and the potential of Avraham.

Sarah שרה was complete when her name was Sarai שרי. That's why she was not able to conceive for pregnancy.

The letter "י" in her name Sarai שרי represents the number 10 which means completeness.

Just like how Adam was turned into two lives, the creator turned the letter "י" in  Sarai שרי name into two "ה"s (5) which means life, and gave the ה-male aspect to Avram אברם and he became Avraham אברהם while the ה-female aspect remained with her and Sarai שרי became Sarah שרה.

This way she was able to unite and become one again with her male aspect being carried by her soulmate Avraham and conceive for pregnancy.

 

As you know the result of this unification was their beloved child Issac.

The creator shows Sarai שרי was holding the ה-male aspect which was missing in Avram אברם and that SHE was the lack and the potential of Avram אברם.

When Avraham's servant Eliezer was looking for a suitable mate for Issac, he set a condition that if he found a girl who was willing to help him, she would be the one the creator had chosen as the soulmate for Issac.

However, not only he did find a girl to help him, he found a wife for Issac to help him see what he couldn't see.

As her only soulmate of Issac, Rivkah was kind, smart, and of course strong.

While Issac believed in his firstborn Esav to be the leader and planned to give him his best blessings, Rivkah believed in Jacob to be the leader. She turned the situation around where Issac gave his best blessings to Jacob, and not to Esav.

Just like Sarah, Rivkah was aware of the purpose of the creator. She even put her own life and Jacob's life on line because of her belief.

And the fact Issac had weak eyes or was not able to see clearly is only a SIGN to inform us RIVKAH was his eyes and potential.

Yes, Rivkah was the eyes of Issac and with her plan, Torah goes to such extent to tell us a woman could act as the eyes of her soulmate since men follow their eyes.

As we see, Jacob took the lead and reached his potential, and became ISRAEL.

(make sure to read my article about G-d's plan: ISRAEL)

As the soulmates of Jacob, Rachel, and Leah also gave their maids to Jacob for continuity and growth.

Prior to that, Rachel even let her own sister Leah marry Jacob first to also help her with continuity and growth.

Of course, Jacob had no clue Leah was pretending to be Rachel in order to marry him, and that he was dealing with his own karma when he did pretend to be Esav in order to take the best blessings from his father.

And his best or most blessings did come through Leah!

Did Jacob love Leah?

No.

He was not even attracted to her.

Did Leah love Jacob?

Yes, very much.

The more she gave him the more she loved him.

Leah gave Jacob EVERYTHING a man could ever ask for...

 

She gave him six sons, equal to half of the Jewish tribes, including Reuben his FIRST born, LEVI who G-d chose his tribe for himself. Moshe, Aaron, and Miriam came from Levi. Aaron became COHEN, where all Cohanim come from. Yehuda the KING of Israel. King David came from Yehuda. We can see his names such as “Yehudi” and “Juda” in the Jewish nation until today. She even gave him a DAUGHTER called Dina. After Leah died, she was buried in the same place as Avraham, Issac, and their wives, and later Jacob was buried there too.

Can you say they were not soulmates?

Of course not!

If Jacob married Leah, it was the creator's plan because they were soulmates and it was for the best REGARDLESS if Jacob loved her or not.

Leah was there to complete one aspect of Jacob while Rachel and the maids were there to fulfill his other aspects.

Torah tells us Jacob loved Rachel.

But did Rachel love Jacob?

Not as much as Leah loved him.

Jacob planned to marry Rachel because he gave priority to her physical appearance, not her behavior.

By switching the place of Rachel with Leah so that Jacob marries Leah FIRST and Rachel SECOND, the creator changed Jacob's plan to teach him and his future generation to give priority to behavior when looking to get married and physical appearance shall be a plus.

Yes, the creator wants men to learn from women to give priority to behavior, not physical appearance. 

​

 

Part III - Power and Potentials

​

While we believe soulmates are all about attraction and love, the story of our fathers and mothers, especially, the story of Jacob and Leah tells us continuity and growth based on the purpose of the creator serves a higher purpose. 

We also learn our wishes may not be for our very best.

As our father and the owner of all souls, only the creator knows what is best for each soul.

He is the one who does the matching process and brings you face-to-face to meet with your soulmate.

 

The creator is well aware of your weaknesses as well as your abilities and therefore matches you with the right soul to make you become strong.

After all, He did separate Adam and Chava to make them strong again. 

 

Torah says “the creator brought Chava to Adam.” By using this verse, it is obvious Torah is informing us about the creator being in charge of you meeting your soulmate.

Many married couples have exceptional stories about how they met. I'm sure you've heard some stories too.

If you're looking to get married, do your best and be patient. When the right time comes, you'll meet and marry the person the creator has chosen for you, even if that person is not your type.​

You and your soulmate are matched like a coin having two faces representing your astrological signs.

Although a coin has two faces opposite of each other, your challenges with your soulmate are to face each other.

While I encourage you to read about your astrological sign to learn more about your powers, the traits described in your sign are potentially within you or can be controlled. Therefore, I discourage you from judging your soulmate based on the information you've conceived from reading his/her sign.

 

Don't forget your parents play a significant role in your personality traits.

Although there may be several reasons for matching you with your soulmate, one reason is that a bad trait is an infection passed to us by the previous generations or others. If we don't cure the infection, we'll spread it to others and/or pass it to the next generations.

For this reason, you're matched with a soul in order to force you to recognize the bad trait and cure it.

Your soulmate is closer to you than your shirt and the best person to help you see yourself clearly.

 

Because you're facing your soulmate, you're facing a number of possibilities...

If you see a trait you don't like,

(a) most probably it's a balance issue not being at the same level of behavior, or
(b) maybe it's a reflection of your own character in the same or a different level, or
(c) it could be a test to see if you learn and follow or you protect yourself, or
(d) because YOU don't like it, doesn't necessarily mean it's bad. You must look into it.

If you see a trait you do like, however,
 

(a) most likely it's a message to you to learn and follow, or
(b) just because YOU like it, doesn't necessarily mean it's good. Again, you must look into it.

Perhaps it's the lifestyle or cultural differences you need to pay more attention to.

Expect the unexpected and be aware...
 

• wrong expectations are the enemies of your relationship with your soulmate.

• honesty is the best policy in building trust which is the foundation of a strong relationship.

• accept your soulmate for who he/she is and focus on changing yourself.

And believe your soulmate is your lack and potential meaning you complement each other.

 

Giving yourself the label of being "single" while you're "married" to your family and/or friends is a WRONG label to put on yourself and it's misleading. You cannot be married to two or more people at the same time and expect to have a great relationship with your soulmate. 

 

Once you marry someone, you married your soulmate REGARDLESS if your marriage works or not.

While you HAVE TO do your very BEST to make your marriage work, there are some exceptions to the rules too.

In some cases, a married couple MUST leave their marriage in order to reach their POTENTIALS.

In fact, a marriage could be a trap to stop someone from reaching his/her potential.

Think POTENTIALS and do your very BEST to reach there.

If you're not aware of your potential, you can find them in your powers.

The creator gives you the POWER to see your COLOR.

Remember, the creator cannot expect from you or test you with something you don't have.

How could He?

So your potentials are within your abilities.

Unfortunately, Satan is aware of our abilities and does everything possible in his power to stop us from reaching our potential.

But one thing is for sure...

The creator can only expect us to do our very best, nothing more.

​
 

Part IV - Creation and Soulmates

 

 

Creation IS about soulmates.

 

That's WHY Torah starts with number 2 (ב) in order to inform us "creating" starts with "male" and "female" and continues by referring to the upper world or spiritual world as father/male aspect and the lower world or physical world as mother/female aspect.

When the creator took the physical world out from the spiritual world, similar to what He did to Adam and Chava later, He turned a STRONG world into two “weak” worlds in need of each other. By bringing unification between these two "weak" worlds, He created Adam to be the STRENGTH or the glue between them.

Adam was created to be the "cause" for unity. He stood between the upper world and the lower world. In order for him to keep his "position" as the STRENGTH between these two "weak" worlds and give himself life, he MUST continue keeping both worlds united. 

 

(make sure to read my article about the Position)

​Adam and Chava were created on the sixth day of creation to demonstrate that they are the CAUSE since the number six in Hebrew means AND. It's the symbol of connecting for continuity because whenever we want to continue, we connect with the AND word, which becomes the CAUSE of continuity.

Interestingly enough, the letter ו consists of a "body" and a "head" representing humans.

By uniting the physicality and spirituality the creator made Adam, a Star of Unity, a KNOWLEDGE beyond our knowledge.

Imagine you could do the same, and recreate yourself by being the cause of unification between your physical mother and your spiritual father who are within you as “body and soul.”

Every time you say a blessing when you eat or drink you do make unification between your body and your soul because your actions are physical and your words are spiritual and you put them together.

If you are a Jew, this is also true when you put on a Tefilin, Talit, or say a blessing when required by your action.

People make a serious mistake in thinking about what would saying a blessing do for them, not realizing the creator made his creation through words. By saying a blessing you'll bring a "light" to your knowledge which helps your continuity and growth in life.

I would like to ask a question from those people who don't believe in saying a blessing when they eat or drink.

If someone asked you what is the relationship between your body and your soul, what would your answer be?

If you don't know, they’re married to each other.

But, what do you call a marriage without having sex?

Every time you make a blessing, you make unification between your body (mother nature) and your soul (spiritual father) within you which is similar to having sex.

Never forget Adam was created BECAUSE of this unification.
 

You're probably not aware it’s not really about having a body and a soul. It’s about having a "marriage relationship" between them.

 

And a marriage relationship needs boundaries or limitations which partners set to protect their marriage from falling so that they stay together forever.

 

The creator gives a list of these boundaries as forbidden laws in Torah in order for us to keep our bodies and our souls married.

 

Adam and Chava passed their limits when they ate from the forbidden tree.

 

As a result, they brought separation between their bodies and their souls, and their souls left their bodies.

 

In other words, their souls got divorced and left them.

 

That’s when they died.

 

But they could have lived forever, and so can you.

 

Remember restraint is strength.

 

Your soulmate is there for you to grow, and so is your soul.

 

Therefore,

 

• Unite with Your Soulmate

• Unite with Your Soul

​

 

Bahram Cohanfard

​

​

​